Holiday wishes and miscellany

There’s no snow in Brooklyn, at least not yet, but we in the Maud household are buried nonetheless.

If you celebrate Christmas, have a great one. If you don’t, enjoy the quiet. The blogging and email response forecast through the end of 2004 remains unpredictable. For now, here’s a personal, less-than-heartwarming holiday story of sorts that some of you may remember from last year. And, because I’m procrastinating, a few random things:

  • The Guardian‘s holiday quiz tests your knowledge of seasonal first lines like this one: “It was Christmas Day and Danny the Car Wiper hit the street junksick and broke after seventy-two hours in the precinct jail.”
  • Roth and Hollinghurst dominate Britain’s end-of-year best novel selections. Zoe Heller and Anita Brookner have given the nod to The Line of Beauty.
  • In related news, the Landover Baptist folks have outdone themselves this year with a list of proscribed Christmas gifts, “Lucifer’s Toy Chest,” which includes:

    Leap Start Learning Table – Marketed to Caucasian children and Colored adults, this so-called “Learning Table” spits out lies about math, science and other secular bunk Christ-haters teach in public schools. We suggest you just start your toddler out with an illustrated King James Bible and a spanking instead.

  • What’s better than going home to visit family at the holidays? Returning to an email inbox filled with urgent requests from coworkers, jokes forwarded by friends, and solicitations from Viagra purveyors, mortgage brokers, and the ever-present “young sl*ts getting creamy facials.”

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