I mean no offense; some of my best friends in the world are Yankees

Well, I Suwannee. I just about had a conniption fit after I happened upon Dana’s latest pack of lies, but then I remembered that you can’t expect a Yankee to have any manners:

Did you know I’m more of a Southerner than Maud Newton? Me neither. How could this be? I’ve only lived a small part of my life there, and Maud *embodies* the South. I mean, my fondest memory of her is meeting her for brunch one spring morning. Fanning herself demurely as I approached (10 minutes late), she set down her sweet tea, peeked out from under the brim of her dramatic church lady hat and said, “Sweetie, I love that outfit more and more *every* time I see it.”

And this after I held myself back from pointing out not only that she was wearing white shoes before Easter but that it’s positively indecent to go without panties on The Lord’s Day.

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