Humor and law enforcement, more

From An Interview with an Anonymous Former Humor Writer and Current Employee of a Metropolitan Police Department:

Tell us a little bit about making the transition from humor writer to police officer.

It was actually pretty easy, since writing humor and enforcing the law have a common goal: exposing lies. Humorists feed off the hypocrisy of institutions, while cops receive a steady diet of b.s. from the general population. It’s astonishing what people will lie about when face-to-face with a cop. I once had someone tell me they were in another state at the moment I was speaking with them.

I linked to one last month, but Fitzcarraldo’s posts at Trueboy are funny and frank and sometimes disturbing:

Tonight I picked up a trashy piece of ass and took him out for steak and single malt. It was my way of toasting the autumn.

The Season of the Witch.

I felt happier than I had in days, despite the fact that the restaurant was filled to the rafters with small-time, small-dick suits and their stupid boobjob miami bitches. The fact was that it felt good to go out and spend some money. The place I spent it in hardly mattered. Well, maybe not “hardly”, but it certainly didn’t matter very much. I was fine as long as there was expensive whiskey. Everything, absolutely EVERYTHING is made better by expensive whiskey. That, and a leather backed chair for my soon-to-be boytoy to sprawl improperly in. The steakhouse was tacky, but it certainly wasn’t cheap. I got a secret thrill when I thought of the size of the check and how by paying for it I was going to effectively purchase my boytoy, several times over. Every so often, I reached into my jacket and gently caressed the fat roll in my breast pocket—the perfect tip of my manicured nail just barely brushing the billfold.

(Scroll down to posts labelled “by fitzcarraldo.”)

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