Apra-poe

This post was written by Friday guest blogger Annie Reid.

Surely, other authors have had homages, both fortunate and not, but I can’t just seem to get off the Poe. There’s the beer, the pizza, the action figure, the Michael Jackson casting decision.

But today brings a sorrowful note to the world of culinary homage. The St. Louis Post-Dispatch finds that Edgar Allan Poe pizza a disappointment, especially in comparison to an old classic:

Socrates’ Revenge tastes like a Greek salad on a pizza crust. Somehow the olive oil, black and green olives, spinach, mozzarella, fontina and feta cheeses, red onion and minced garlic are everything that Edgar Allan Poe isn’t.

In fact, sitting before the cyclonic saucer of this pizza (some quoth) is a little bit like this:

It was this –my chin rested upon the floor of the prison, but my lips and the upper portion of my head, although seemingly at a less elevation than the chin, touched nothing. At the same time my forehead seemed bathed in a clammy vapor, and the peculiar smell of decayed fungus arose to my nostrils. I put forward my arm, and shuddered to find that I had fallen at the very brink of a circular pit, whose extent, of course, I had no means of ascertaining at the moment.

Ideally in a place like that, they’d have a jukebox, entirely filled with music from Edgar Allen Poe-inspired prog rock concept albums. Not as hard as it sounds. Lou Reed did it, the Alan Parson’s Project did it. But before all of them, Glass Prism did it. Check out those velvet suits and the sinister raven. They put Poe’s poetry to late 60’s psychedelic rock. No original lyrics. You can listen to “The Raven” here. It RAWKS.

(Also this recording of the likes of Iggy Pop, Marianne Faithful, Jeff Buckley and Gabriel Byrne reading Poe tales really puts some flies in my ointment, if you know what I’m sayin’.)

Unfortunate Literary Homage Special Bonuspack!

For Lovecraft fans, there’s “Hello, Cthulhu!“, wherein a cute, beribboned Cthulhu finds demonic wrath hard to pull off in a world of inoffensive kittens and puppies. Or maybe these cuddly soft plush Cthulhu dolls can help keep you warm and toasty on long apocalyptic nights. Cthulhu for Chids!


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